Sarcasm Monster Headed To Clobber Corruption
In a bizarre turn of events, a gigantic sarcasm monster made entirely out of mutated weeds is reportedly headed toward Florida. According to eyewitnesses, the monster has a putrid odor, much like the stale jokes that come out of the mouths of ignorant people.
The monster, which stands over 50 feet tall, was first spotted in the swamplands of Louisiana, where it was seen devouring a field of sarcastic remarks. It then proceeded to make its way down the Mississippi River, with its sights set firmly on the Sunshine State.
Experts believe that the monster was created as a result of the excessive amount of lies and corruption that have plagued the political scene in recent years. As a result, the sarcasm in the atmosphere has mutated the weeds into a massive, sentient being with a snarky attitude.
Many Floridians are concerned about the monster’s arrival, but others seem to be taking it in stride. One local resident quipped, “Well, I guess we can finally say that Florida is truly the land of the sarcastic.”
The National Guard has been deployed to deal with the situation, but it is unclear how they plan to stop a monster made entirely out of weeds. One military official commented, “We’re not quite sure what we’re dealing with here, but we’re hoping that a few well-placed jokes might do the trick.”
As the sarcasm monster draws closer to Florida, residents are advised to stay indoors and avoid making any sarcastic remarks, as this may only serve to further inflame the creature. One thing is for sure, Florida will never be the same again.