4:20 Pm Sunday
Bill Azin Reports:
Walled Lake Michigan made the news again today with what we are calling the Walltucky Wolly Mammoth Rampage. Walled Lake has its fair share of headlines due to those cannabis rebels from Greenhouse Walled Lake. But today another story is breaking the internet. This jurassic news story is trending out of control just like the middle-aged wooly mammoth stomping around Walled Lake.
“WHOAAAAAAAAA…”, is all that could be heard for blocks all around what seems to be the downtown of Walled lake. People in the street completely stopping in their tracks looking absolutely bewildered. Cars slamming on the brakes over completely stopped vehicles in the road people with dropped jaws and widespread fainting.
One budtender from Greenhouse Walled Lake was out feeding the Wolly beast with some Michigan brand edibles in an attempt to settle him down. She was chasing the historical beast and referring to the mammoth as “her little darling”. Several correspondents were wondering if she was actually high while following him down the road.
“here darling… would you like some afternoon delight? Maybe some Detroit Fudge Company brownie bites… Darling…? …Come here little darling… and tell momma what you want.”
Greenhouse of Walled is known as an endangered cannabis provisioning center threatened by mega-corporate marijuana. However, the owners and staff are fearlessly serving the community purposely creating the preservation of community-centered cannabis. They feel that the corporate weed channels lack the love and individual care that the only Greenhouse can deliver to the Walled Lake Cannabis Community.
“The Greenhouse is 100% locally owned and operated. There are no out-of-state investors to answer to. There’s no shareholders making decisions that benefit “the bottom line” at the expense of employees and customers. That’s “Corporate Weed.” -Jerry Millen
Wolly Mammoth Rampage starts out with a groundbreaking experiment that went horribly wrong. Apparently, a couple of rednecks from walltucky found interest in DNA sequencing after they blew up their distillate lab.
“After we exploded our trailer laboratory, we had to come up with a new plan, and that’s, when Leroy started messing with CRISPR Technology. We found out that DNA test tube babies is not too difficult”.
The groundbreaking experiment only took 22 months starting with the gestation period, then they stole some elephants from the Detroit Zoo and whammy our firstborn was a boy! We named him after his daddy Leroy Jenkins. We feed him mainly grasses. That’s probably why he came down here. He could smell that fine cannabis grass! Yee-Haw, Yall sure do have some great weed! Jim bob Stated in the press release. The cool thing is that now we will be exporting Wolly Mammoths. More on this later.
This story was brought to you by Fluresh Cannabis.
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